by Helen Macrae

Greetings penny-pinchers! Here are this week’s tips to keep you in the black…

Hunt down the wealthy

Perhaps for masochists only. When you’re broker than broke, what could be more fun than mingling with the rich and famous to remind yourself of all the money you don’t have and things you’ll never be able to afford. Take a stroll round the affluent barrios of Salamanca, Retiro and Opera and you can almost smell the money wafting off the residents. Get followed round the designer boutiques by suspicious shop assistants, laugh at all the pijos with their Lacoste shirts and slicked-back hair, and try not to trip over any small yappy rat-dogs kitted out in diamante-encrusted collars and fluffy coats.

Become a kept man/woman

Everyone knows that there’s nothing more fun than enjoying yourself when someone else is paying. Use your time in Salamanca productively by staking out the pijo hotspots and practising your Spanish chat-up lines and, sooner or later, a wealthy boy/girlfriend will be yours! Once you’ve bagged yourself a filthy rich other half then your work is done, so just sit back, relax and proceed to rinse them for every penny they’ve got. Happy hunting!

by Helen Macrae

As city, Madrid has got it all. With theatres and tapas, bars and bullfighting, shopping and sunshine, it’s cosmopolitan, frenetic, bold, brash and…smelly.

When I first touched down in Spain I was overwhelmed by the host of aromas to hit my nose (starting with that all-too familiar smell of smoke mere seconds after I had walked into arrivals), but after a while I became accustomed to it all as I busied myself with daily life, trotting around the city teaching executives useful words like chav, monkfish and Tesco clubcard. It took a visit from my parents and their non-initiated noses to remind me that Madrid has an amazing array of aromas, some of them nice and some of them nasty, but all combining to create that unique “Esencia de Madrid”.

My sensory journey begins each morning at Metro Sol, when I change from Line 3 to Line 1 and my nostrils are hit with the delicious smell of freshly-baked waffles coming from the cafe in the station. Luckily I’m always in too much of a rush to stop and buy any, otherwise I’d currently be the size of a small country. Unfortunately though, even this divine smell is sometimes not enough to mask the stink of drains which seems to permanently hang in the air round Sol. Other unpleasant odours I experience on the Metro to work are B.O., bad breath and, my personal favourite, the smell of someone sweating out alcohol they drank the night before. Yuk.

More agreeable aromas you might encounter as you journey round Madrid include cut grass when the gardeners have been out in force in one of the city’s numerous parks, along with the delightful scent of flowers as you walk by the Botanical Gardens next to the Retiro. The smell of cigarette smoke is pretty much unavoidable anywhere you go, as is that of frying food, both of which may or may not to be your taste. As you wander round Lavapies you’re hit with the pungent smell of curry, laced with a whiff of hash and perhaps a dash of urine. Walk round the more well-heeled barrios of the city such as Salamanca, Retiro and Opera, and you can smell money.

But my favourite smell in Madrid is one that it’s difficult to put my finger on, and which at times can be quite elusive. As my mate H puts it, it’s that smell you sometimes catch a waft of on a summer’s evening, just as dusk is drawing in, a smell full of promise and anticipation of the night’s adventures. The smell of fun!

Madrid Metro - Smells delightful?